Mirror Parents

Children are mirrors of their parents. Parents will always be the best mentor for their children.The way we behave is their behavior. The way we walk is how they walk, the way we eat is how they eat, the way we speak is how they speak, and so on so forth.Sometimes we may not notice this, but if we look very carefully, we may find it.

Since we conceived them, they will be what we plan them to be. For example, if the parents brought up the child without warmth and love, they almost certainly will not be a very positive child. However, if the parents take maintains proper nutrition, positive energy, love, healthy energy, proper rest, sufficient exercise, etc., it will be reflected in the child's positive behavior towards the parents and others.

Babies learn by imitation. Have you heard of 'monkey see, monkey do'? Well, when Irina, my youngest, was 2 years old, her first word that come out from her mouth was "NO", not mummy or daddy. It's simply because that's my favorite word to her when she started doing things on her own. And now that she is 3 years old, she's starting to imitate my sentences, the way I talk, and also the way I always behave.

Another example is when my son will start shouting "stupid" to other car drivers if he notices that they simply overtake or drive too fast because that is my husband's favorite word when he is driving. My elder daughter, Ivy, on the other hand, likes to sulk whenever her wish or request is not fulfilled. That is my character as well. All of my children taught me and my husband a lesson by mirroring us.

Most parents face problems with stubborn children. The worse part is when they start to shout back at you when you are trying to stop them from doing certain things that you do not want them to do. So whose fault is that? Actually it is not their fault alone, remember that your children will mirror everything from you. Yes, YOU! Have you ever sit down and recall the way you speak to them, your husband, your mom, your sibling, your friends, or even your neighbors? If not well, you better do it right now.

If you want your children to learn self-control, show it by your example. If in trying to teach self-control to a child, you keep losing your temper, the child will pick up the temper and not the self-control you are trying to teach. Like the Malay saying goes "seperti ketam mengajar anaknya berjalan lurus" (crooked teacher, crooked student).

So from now on, stop blaming your children for their bad behavior. As parents it is our responsibility to correct them when they are wrong and be a good mentor to them. What you need to do is just relaunch yourself, reset you positive mind and your positive attitude, insyAllah they will turn out to be good people in the future